Dear Administrative Entity,

Please allow me to start this letter by acknowledging that I am nothing but an insignificant student. The many, many hours I devote to the study of computer science do not, alas, allow me to apply myself to perfecting the art of mind reading. This is why I humbly come to you with a doubtlessly ridiculous suggestion.

What if instead of "Please fill in the attached form and bring it to our office during opening hours", your instructions read "Please fill in the attached form, disregard the mention that you should not fill in sections D.2 and E, and bring it to our office during opening hours together with your student ID and social security card, as well as copies of your visa, both sides of you I-94, and pages 1 and 3 of your I-20"?

Wouldn't that be most helpful to all the students who, like me, only have a very limited success in the art of divination, and to your employees, whose precious working hours could then be freed of repeating to every one of us the same information regarding forms, copies, and sections D.2 and E?

May I also mention that, aside from the very inconvenient location of your offices with respect to my department, what is for you a mere trifle of carefully aligned numbers and neatly stacked triplicates is, for me, the key to my paycheck, which you are holding up until you are fully satisfied with my form-filling abilities.

On an additional note, is the employee I saw today (a very nice lady, by the way, despite her complete inability to understand why I would feel ever so slightly upset over this situation) always made up in this peculiar fashion or are the white foundation and red eye shadow a Halloween special?

With much humble respect,
#49462916 (student ID redacted to protect the guilty).