Or rather, back on the Internet, as I've been back in town for a week now.

It's been a fantastic month. My mind is still whirling with a constant stream of images and memories, from Portland's bars to Monument Valley's jeep ride, from Chicago's street sculptures (by none less than Picasso, Miró, Dubuffet, or Calder) to the helicopter diving into the Grand Canyon, from Boston's clam chowder to the beautiful arches of Utah, from Washington DC's National Gallery to driving the 17 miles of dirt road of the Valley of the Gods at the wheel of a Hyundai Accent, from walking one last time on the beach with a couple of friends to my last dances in Southern California, from the laughters and hugs at the pub this one last night to the last precious goodbye words spoken or written to me...

There's been the confusion, too, of not knowing whether I was happy to be back in France, sipping a very drinkable coffee in a random café while reading the newspaper, gently hugging my grandma in spite of her steadier and steadier nagging about when I'm going to give her a great-grand-daughter, taking care of my dog, seeing my mountains again, slowly starting to turn to the bright reds and oranges and yellows of autumn... or sad to leave so many good people and things behind. I've finally decided it was possible to be both, and it's actually easier and easier to focus on the future and the bright possibilities it holds. Especially given the fantastic fellowship I got: two years of funding for me and extra money for my lab, as well as two months of intensive German classes prior the beginning of my research project!

I feel suspended between both cultures at the moment. Being in my hometown, a place where, let's face it, I never really fit, and which is clearly provincial, makes the differences stand out more than a city like Paris would. Shops close at lunch time; deaths are announced by means of small posters tapped to the walls of the various neighborhoods; and here I am, dancing to the sound of the swing music in my headphones, thinking about maths and postdoctoral studies and bioinformatics and moving to Germany, feeling both at home and quite out of place.

More importantly, I still feel pretty good about it all.